Rick Ankiel and I-70 – Islands in the Stream

Earlier in the week, the Royals continued their run at collecting every reclamation project in baseball by bringing in outfielder Rick Ankiel.  For the time being, he’s being counted on to man CF and provide the club with the 25-homer bat that they did not have.  Sure, he can’t hit lefties, but Ankiel can hit an easy 20+ homers with 130 games of health.  What’s most interesting to me is how the tale of his career mirrors the stretch of interstate between his old home, St. Louis, and his new abode, Kansas City.

Downtown St. Louis - At the age of 20, the phenom burst onto the scene with an 11-7 record while racking up 194 Ks in just 175 innings of hurling.  Things looked great just like they do upon your first viewing of the Arch, the glowing Lumiere casino, the brand new downtown ballpark, the historic courthouse, and hell, there are even the dozens of places to get drunk and belligerent down on the Landing.  What could go wrong?

North St. Louis - Continuing westward along I-70, you go through some of the more dilapidated areas — Pine Lawn, Normandy, Northwoods, etc.  Heck, even before you immediately leave downtown you’re stuck with a view of the outdated and Oldsmobile plant-like, Edward Jones Dome.  And, I haven’t even gotten to the run-down airport where brand new run ways and large, unused terminals sit idly by.  Ankiel knows all about those depths.  His ‘00 postseason included nine wild pitches in four innings.  He still didn’t have his ‘yips’ under control in ‘01 and was sent back to the minors where he promptly blew out his elbow.

I-70/270 interchange - Just try heading west out of St. Louis between 3:00 and 6:00.  It’s automobile heaven where all is right … except if you enjoy moving automobiles.  While gridlock ensues, you might want to make certain you brought War and Peace on audiotape.  Ankiel is also used to such stalls … he missed all of 2002 and was never fully healthy in ‘03 and ‘04.

Wentzville - Ankiel gave pitching one last shot in the spring of ‘05 and after more wild and awful results, he announced he was retiring … for a few hours, at least.  The next day, after persuasion from his agent, Scott Boras, and his GM, Walt Jocketty, the former-pitching stud announced he would give it a go as an outfielder.  Much like Ankiel’s pseudo-retirement,  Wentzville is the perfect quick stop for re-filling along I-70.  It’s also home to the last White Castle restaurant west of the Mississippi and, although it feels great while in the act of eating, those belly bombers can hit like a load of bricks soon after … much like have Scott Boras as your agent, convincing you that you should still hand over 10% of your wages while playing a position you haven’t tried since high school.

Columbia – Missouri’s favorite college town is a destination for anyone from age 18 to 70.  Whether you’re living or re-living your college days, you can count on a copious amounts of booze, gals, and sports.  It’s the closest that Big Mo gets to Big Fun.  Ankiel can relate.  His run from mid-’05 to the end of ‘07 was a cherished time where he became a major league-worthy power hitter.  His work with the lumber gave him renewed spirit, vigor, and worth.  It all came to a head near the end of ‘07 when he powered the ball over the wall in the first game of his return to the big leagues.

XXX Clubs - Anyone who has hit the desert between Columbia and KC can relate to how lonely this stretch of I-70 can be … unless, of course, you’re into adult video games, DVDs, or peep shows!  No matter your preference, this 80-mile stretch of boredom features some of the finest hillbilly women that mid-Missouri has to offer.  It’s a blast … until you walk in the door!  Ankiel’s 08 was a blast, too … until he pushed things too far.  He was having a break-through season before injuring his abdominal in New York in late-July.  He never recovered as his bat disappeared and his production took a major spill.

East Kansas City - Does anyone knows what in the world goes on here?  It’s Blue Springs and then … and then …?  It’s all a blur.  Even after transversing it via I-70, you wonder if it really happened.  Ankiel had a similar feeling the night of  May 4th when he crashed head first into the center field wall while trying to make a catch.  He came back to a bench gig and by the end of the year, he awoke to find that he was 30, a free agent, and no longer wanted.  What the hell had happened?

Kauffman Stadium – And, now both interstate and player arrive at their destination.  It’s a top-notch ball yard in the midst of a sea of concrete.  Ankiel is a top-notch talent in the midst of injury, confidence issues, and a fear of concrete walls.

Here’s hoping his career finally veers off of I-70, thus avoiding any contact with the downfall of  our Union … Kansas.